One thing I have come to learn over the years of being a mother is there is a mom code. It's a code that mothers don't talk about they just do. Even if you're not that close with someone, but there a mom or your kids are friends, you respect the mom code. Heck even seeing a complete strangers with kids, you respect the mom code. What code is that? Some of you are already giggling at this point because you just know.
The unspoken code
Let's face it being a mom is tough work. There's no manual that comes with these things when they are born. It's not like a car or phone or complex atom, you really don't know what you're getting into until you have the kid. No matter how many books you read or people try to share their "tips" with you, you're never fully prepared for that melt down on isle 2, the poo smeared EVERY WHERE or controlled chaos that is know as raising children. So when you become friends with other women in this same predicament you have a unspoken agreement with them, no one ever shakes hands on it or even ever talks about it, it's just there.Because you're a mom
Don't get me wrong dad's understand the agreement too, but mom's seem to live by it. It's part of us. Why? Because once you become a mom, (even if you just have one) you silently sit every night after said (child)ren go to sleep, wondering how you made it through another day without killing them! (purposely or accidentally) The funny thing is all mom's do it! This is the formula that gives life to the code.The code
So what's the code? Plain and simple it's a few unspoken rules that all mom's live by (or should). Maybe you don't do all these things with every mom you know but a chosen few should fall under all the rules.The mom pledge
1. I promise to do big and little favors for other moms involving their children because I know one day I will need to call on her or another mom to help me with my kids. AKA it takes a village.
2. I promise to judge your parenting... SILENTLY. Your not the perfect mom but more importantly neither am I.
3. I promise to give you my opinion and suggestions because that's what mom's do. BUT I also promise to NOT be pushy about my opinions, to NOT hold a grudge if you don't take them and especially to NOT say "I told you so" when I'm right.
4. I promise to treat your kids like my own, love them even if they're brats and care about them... really care.
5. Go to your kids events, support them, buy them gifts and cheer them on because I know you'll do the same for mine.
6. I promise to pamper you when I can. We mom's don't always get enough appreciation. If you need me I'm here. I'm a phone call away. I'll bring the wine when you're sad or super stressed out. Bring you flowers because your hubby is being a jerk, hate him with you when he's dumb and praise him when you're happy with him. Send you funny cards physically and virtually just cause. Cook your family dinner or take you out because you need a break. Be your partner in crime when you need a mom weekend. (okay night, let's face it getting away for an entire weekend is impossible)
All because despite my being completely crazy you still love me. And mostly because you're a mom too.
This post is dedicated to the mom's that have supported me; thank you to the Red Queen, Mother Oyster, White Rabbit, the Cheshire Cat and my "group", my sister's, you know who you are. I love you gals.
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Thanks for sharing another adventure with me!
Stay safe, stay sane and stay absolutely splendid!
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