Thursday - 3.7.2013
If you have or had young children you know without a doubt there will be those questions that are less than comfortable to answer. The top one being "how do babies get in mommies tummies?" Have you prepared? I'm prepared now after my first child at age 6, walked in on me and my ex-husband getting it on doggy-style, yeah way beyond birds and the bees there! But being prepared for the biggest of childhood questions does not prepare you for some of the other head shaking questions our little kiddo's come up with.
The Dormouse recently hit me with a curve ball that made me realize she's rapidly approaching the age where I need to have all the answers... again. She and I are on our way to dance class, as I drive I sing along to my favorite country station and she's playing in her car seat with two barbie-like dolls.
When from out of no where I hear "Mommy, where's her pee pee? I see her butt, but I don't see no pee pee. Where's her pee pee mommy?"
Now looking back there are plenty of things I should have said, but instead I froze and my mind went wild... Why is she looking for the dolls pee pee?!?! All I could think to myself was "Oh no she's going to be just like me! Curious about sex, move to fast and get pregnant young. Great my mother was right, pay back is a B and I'm raising mini me!"
Whoa, whoa, whoa Alice, slow down! She's 3 and just a few months ago I empowered her with the knowledge that she's now looking for more clarity on. See up until then she believed that everything "down there" was her butt. She was saying her butt hurt, but pointing to her pee pee. So I unknowingly revealed to her that there are two different slits going on down there. She has since become very interested in both of them.
So this should have come as no surprise to me when she was curious about where the dolls hoo hoo was. So back to the story, my reply was "Dolls don't have pee pee's." Now, this made it worse.
Dormouse: "Why not? She has a butt so she can go poop! Does she pee out of her butt?"
Me: "Ugh, no dolls don't poop or pee."
Dormouse: "Mom she has a butt, she poops."
Me: "Ok lets not talk about the dolls butt anymore. Ok let's sing!"
Why do 3 year old's have to be so smart? The show should be are you smarter than a 3 year old, not a 5 grader. Although I've given up on helping my 5 grader with his homework because to save my life, I don't remember how to do long division or what a cursive F looks like.
What's a question that your kid(s) have asked you that made your face turn red and your stomach do flips?